As I mentioned before, I've been feeling a bit down (translates as: absoulutelty totally miserable). There is one main reason for this. Work. I don't know how many times I've been told by so many different people that I shouldn't let it get to me. I've agreed with them and tried not to care so much but I've come to realise this is impossible for me. It's just part of who I am. I do care and I do take my job seriously. Which is why I should really be trying my hardest to find a job that requires me to care.
Things got so bad on Monday that I started thinking that I should use my savings to enrol myself on a Social Work course instead of going travelling. I'd get myself a pet rat and work and study until finally I'd be in a postion where I didn't have to settle for minimum wage menial bullshit. But it's my dream to travel and I'd never be happy settling in a career unless I'd experienced the exotic. The pet rat and social work degree will have to wait.
Thankfully, the girls I work with have given me a bit of strength to carry on. I broke down in tears on Monday. They have all agreed it's been a long time coming. Even just that consoles me. I don't mind showing my emotions as long as people understand why I'm feeling them. They have fully backed me up and said they're surprised I lasted this long. They have told this to a key member of the company and they have also told her about their own discontentment. Things are unravelling slowly but I'm clinging onto my sanity for a wee while yet. If I can just ride this job out 'til I go travelling I'll be able to diclose all the gory details but for now I'll keep clinging to my board.
7 comments:
Have you ever thought about volunteering as an aid on holidays for the disabled? This might combine your need to travel with your caring nature, and it would look good on the CV for future jobs. Just a thought.......
'All things must pass'
George Harrison
The shit times are there only to help us appreciate the good times all the more.
ever thought about going on holidays with the disabled but leaving them at the airport and haviong a lovely time? glastonbry is on tv. off to london (see zoe's blog)xxxxx
That last comment was probably one of the most crass, ignorant things I have read in a long time. If Karma exists, good luck!
Sorry to hear your work is sucky. No one should have to do a job that makes them feel that bad.
Cheers TK, though I do 'play' the martyr a bit and bring shit on myself (the caring too much) but it's mixed in with other stuff that's totally beyond my control, and yes, noone should have to put up with it.
On a lighter note, my mood is elevated for reasons that I shall post about....right now.
YAF - I didn't know such things existed! I might consider it for the future but right now I've got a lot of soul-searching to do which I think will have to involve as little responsibility as possible. For this stage of it anyway.
Dad - I guess your probably still high from seeing Neil Young, Paul McCartney and Brucey at the weekend!
Anon - If you knew my dad you'd understand that it really is just a joke. He's not ignorant, he's lovely.
Ah Micky Bo, not ignorant, just a sensitive soul in the caring professions who thinks it is funny to leave disabled people at the airport while you go off and have a good time. Now there is a role model!
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