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Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Caffeine Or Caffiene? I Just Don't Know

I'm forcing myself to write this post. I blame facebook for my laziness. That and my being lazy. I think the weekend has a part to play too. Nelly and I went to visit Hails on saturday morning and overdosed on caffeine. She's a lovly girl who thoroughly deserves the adventure she's about to embark on. I first read her blog in the staffroom at school in Thailand. Even though I was a million miles from home, the mental image of Wull Yum and his dices with death had me in stitches.

I went out on Saturday night to celebrate my getting-older-one-day-closer-to-death day. I went out with one of the Scabby Birds Escort Agency representatives who successfully got me very wasted and who completely humoured me when I asked funny questions. Sunday was Dying Day. Monday morning was Hell Morning. By Tuesday things were looking a bit brighter, which brings us to Wednesday. The sun is shining and things are once again fluffy.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Scabby Birds Escort Agency

Is your name Joe? Are you average? Are you an average Joe? Are you tired of going to your friend's birthdays and weddings without a date? Would you consider stepping out with an escort girl but feel that these agencies only cater for a certain type of clientele and that a blonde Posh Spice wannabe swinging off your arm might have some people guessing that she wasn't a real girlfriend?

I am now proud to present Scabby Birds Escort Agency Inc. Your own personal escort can be anything you want her to be; goth, hippy, emo, grunge, punk, or just plain grotty. For Scabby Birds nothing's too scabby. You can choose from several lovely ladies including Dirt Bird, Mucky Megs and, for a limited time only, at a special discounted rate, Hootchin Hannah.

Sorry Gravy Dave and Psychedelic Lee but this picture was ideal for my advertising campaign.