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Saturday, March 25, 2006

Not Smart Enough

Yay!! I've finally updated flickr. It took me a while but it just goes to show how clever I can be when I'm patient. But not so clever that I can add an image to this post. Still, I'm pretty chuffed with myself. I used up my whole 100% in one go. Luckily it's the end of the month.

Happy Days

I don't take my horoscope very seriously unless it's a good one and then it most certainly must be true. My horoscope for this week was a good 'un. I won't tell you where it's from as it's difficult enough to prove the credibility of them without telling you which trashy mag it's been in. Anyway, just because a magazine is trashy doesn't mean it can't be profound:

If you were a tree, you'd be a sapling right now. The first shoots of the new you are comng through, but your branches are still tender and young. You're almost certainly feeling like you have it in you to grow bigger. Enjoy the new feeling - but don't overdo it. There's yet another amazing growth spurt just round the corner. This is an an excellent time for Aries with adventure on their minds. You have heavenly support - you just need to be sure of what you want. Once you've worked that out, the skies are going to do all they can to send you flying into the furture and heading towards making things happen.

So, I am only a sapling right now. It explains the teenage spots and why I was asked what age I am buying cigarette papers!! It is an excellent time for Aries with adventure on the minds. I always have adventure on my mind but luckily I am easily pleased when it comes to adventures and I take this to mean my new house with Jamie. Making things happen. This is probably one of my favourite sentence's ever. I like things to happen although only if they're good things.

I have waded through the mire and once again am feeling positive about things. Nelly is being ace with helping me to organise my new house and everyone is rooting for me. Some folk think I'm mad for turnng down rent free accomodation in a big beautiful house in the countryside with foxes and buzzards, but I am at the age where buzzards and foxes are cool but not as cool as going to the pub with yr mate for a drink. I know I will miss living with Bert and Nelly but I am used to being a sea away from them so a ten minute car journey will seem like nothing. There is lots to be happy about. It is Spring and the days are growing.

How Evil Am I?

I couldn't resist doing the wee test. Unfortunately I'm not cunning enough to post the link, or at least not at this time of the morning, but my result was that I am 38% evil. A bit of evil lurks in my heart but I hide it well. Apparently I am the most dangerous kind of evil.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Boring,Depressing and Miserable

That's me!!I'm finding it really hard to maintain this blog at the minute. It's because I've been so busy doing all the things on the list in the previous post. I haven't managed to take up knitting yet though Zoe.

Nah, it's because everything I write at the minute is pure dung. It's either boring, depressing, sentimental nonsense or it's just not funny enough. If I was a writer I'd call it writer's block but I'm not so it's probably just a block shoved up my arse. I don't want my blog to end up being a space where I just bitch and moan about the world. On the other hand though, it's my blog and I should use it for whatever the hell I want to. I also worry about giving too much of myself away but fuck it, that's the kind of person I am.

Work is probably the most depressing thing in my life. All through Christmas I really tried to stay positive about it and when people asked how it was going I lied and said it was fine. Now I feel like quitting at least five times a week, which is every day I'm there. When I say I'm can't take anymore of something it is normally after weeks of pretending that I can cos I don't like to give up easily. So when I say I've had enough I've had more than enough. It got so bad that I even very very briefly was considering a career in the police force. I think if I spend much longer there I will have nothing left to offer the world.

I was telling my mum a while ago that although I'm 23 I feel like I'm 43. I have no social life and I rarely hang out with anyone my own age at the minute. I have people that I could visit in Belfast but no impetus to see them because of how I'm feeling. I miss my boyfriend like crazy and I miss my people. I miss my old job, my lifestyle, everything. I don't think I want to go back because it wasn't perfect there. Nowhere is. I miss being me though and doing what I do.