Catching Up

I'm so busy not doing the things I'm supposed to do that I'm having to resort to summing up the past few weeks in point form:


* The new job is going well. I can't complain too much when The Boss tries to force feed me chocolate and threatens to do the same with wine.

* According to me, when I'm drunk, our water tastes like nectar from the tap. According to Swisser, when she's sober, our water tastes vile, like there's chemicals in it. Who's right? You decide.

* The funniest conversation I heard this week was between Pearlie (Bert's 82 yr old mum) and Hubert (her 50 something yr old toy boy lover). When asked by Hubert how she's doing, Pearlie says:

Well, I felt like I could be sick tonight but it never came, well, it came a wee bit and my
teeth flew out but I gathered them up and that was that.

* I've all of a sudden become a good cook. My secret is to not follow a recipe, pay no heed to measurments, don't bother to look at a clock or time how long it's been cooking, throw everything together and stare lovingly at it until you think it might be ready. Works every time.

* The stupidest question I've heard all week. Whilst intensely studying an advertisement for Disney character pendants (found in Take A Break magazine for those of you wishing to purchase such items), Bert asks:

Was there one of the seven dwarves called Dave?

Yes Bert, the seven dwarves were called Sleepy, Grumpy, Happy, Sneezy, Dopey, Bashful and Dave. But if you put your glasses on Bert I think you'll find he's actually called Doc.