The People In My Life: Part 2

Jakers doesn't really need an introduction to this blog as he's been a big part of it for so many years. When I first began blogging I was going out with Salt Face. I was very young and naive (I mean younger and more naive) and I guess I really did truly believe that Salt Face and Pepper Head would be together forever. As I got older I became more coy about writing about other people. Jakers and I were "seeing each other" for about 8 months before I allowed myself to be called his girlfriend. But, once I realised that the dude was going to be a part of my life I let my guard down and I wrote about him all the time just as my dear sweet mother writes about Bert all the time. We split up more than once and we were always very dignified about it and there was never ever a need, nor a desire, for me to write about anything that had happened between us.

Jakers and I have been split up for nearly 3 years now and my love for him has extended way beyond the romantic, lustful kind. It has transcended the physical. He is a true friend to me and we have grown together for quite some time now. We have seen each other at the very depths and we have pulled each other out of the mire. We've debated life, love, science and spirituality. We've laughed, sang and cried together. We beared our souls and we know each other inside and out. We don't always agree with each other, which I guess is why we didn't work out but we care very deeply for one another.

I remember reading a book and there was a guy who went to a therapist. He was a jock athlete and was very dismissive of the therapist's work, like it was too feminine and weak for him to engage in. The therapist said,

"It takes tremendous amounts of guts and strength to talk about what you pass off as touchy-feely. Matters of the heart are matters of life. Maybe you've just got a hole in your heart or a block in your brain, but if you need a few minutes to pysch yourself up like in a locker room or something, I'll be happy to sit here while you walk outside and muster up the courage to come back in here and talk to me like a real man with a real heart." The Charge, Brendan Burchard, pg.94.

I always liked that quote because it reminded me that Jakers was a real man with a real heart and it is such a good heart. The reason we can be good friends is because we communicate with each other. The reason it is important for me to be friends with him is because when I was at uni an ex-boyfriend died in a fire. Though our last parting words were positive I regretted every single fight we had and I never wanted to feel that way again about someone I had loved.

Jakers is a bit of a musical child genius. He understands it in a way that I just don't get. He can pick up most instruments and get some kind of a tune out of them within minutes. Mostly, he's winging it but he wings it well. He's also a technical whizz kid. I guess he just has that kind of brain that understands numbers, patterns and sequences. Whereas my brain understands sugar, stupid accents and fluffy animals. The music and history and shared social circle bonds us. He is very much a part of my family. He said to me recently, "I love you like a sister", then he thought about what he'd said, scrunched up his face and said "actually, no, that's a bit weird". I knew what he meant though.