R.I.P. Sweet P.

Today is a struggle. Pepe passed away this morning just after 10. I don't care if she was a rat, she was my rat and she was precious. Last night we were hopeful that she'd pull through. The vet had given her an injection and she was taking small amounts of liquid. I set her out a bowl of yoghurt. She had a little. She fell asleep with her little paws hanging over the edge of the bowl and her nose nearly touching the yoghurt.

Later I took her out of the cage and nursed her in a tea towel for a while. She looked a bit more comfortable than she had been but was still frail and weak. I wanted to cradle her all night but I couldn't. Later in the night she had one last little burst of energy trying to get into her main cage, with Rocky. I kind of knew then that she was dying because rats will always want to go back to their nest to die. I couldn't let her though in case Rocky picked up the infection too.

This morning I really knew it was bad. Her breathing was so light and she was a little cold. I had to leave for work but I told Jakers she wasn't making much improvement and that the vet opened at 10. I called him shortly after 10. He said she wasn't good and, while I was asking him a million questions and giving a million orders, he said to me, "Darling she's stopped breathing". At which point I started to cry down the phone, which made Jakers cry. I thought it was very poignant that she held on long enough to take her last breath while I was on the phone. It was the closest I could be to her side. After I cried for a while I told Jakers to put her into to the cage for a minute so Rocky could say goodbye. Jakers said Rocky groomed her for a while and sniffed her a bit. He seemed to understand.

I know it is hard for some people to understand how I could be upset over a rat but Rocky and Pepe have been my babies for a year. Many a night I have gone out drinking and gone home early to see the rats. When they'd sleep top to toe in the hammock together they looked like a ying yang symbol. I used to love poking my finger inbetween where their stomachs met and giving them a little tickle. And I loved the way when I stroked Pepe's head how her eyes would close over in bliss. And, though I'm sad, I'm able to raise a little smile when I think of her biting Jakers nipple a few weeks ago. It was only a gentle nibble, like what they do to each other when they're grooming.


Me and Jakers are sitting here now remembering all her ways. Rocky is content for the mean time, eating some banana. Next week will be tough on him when we're out at work but I'm hoping he only has to go a few days without company. The reason we got Pepe was for him. Rats don't do good on their own. As soon as I can I'll get 2 more babies. Rocky is such a gentle, docile fella that I don't think we need to worry about them getting on. He needs someone to cuddle with in the hammock. And he needs someone to keep him on his toes like Pepe did. God rest her wee soul.

Poor Pepe

If you could see a picture of this wee girl right now, it doesn't matter how much you dislike rats, your heart would break. Jakers noticed the other night that she had blood on her neck and chin. Our initial reaction was to assume she'd had a fight with Rocky and he'd bit her neck. I took her into the bedroom to try and clean her up and get a look at her but rat's are such delicate little creatures that I was afraid of doing more harm than good.

She also had blood around her nose and I wondered, if Rocky had bit her neck, why she had blood on her nose. And it seemed strange that Rocky did not have any blood on him whatsoever. I did some research on the internet and found her symptoms to be similar to an upper respiratory infection. Either way she was going to have to see the vet.

Mum and I took her this morning. My prognosis was right. At first the vet thought she did have a wound on her neck but when she cleaned Pepe up there was no gash. I was relieved in a way because I didn't think Rocky could be capable of causing such harm, and if he was, we'd have to keep them seaparate. But she is a very poorly little rat and it's breaks my heart to see her like this.

Pepe is the cheeky one. She's the one we had bother with escaping and trying to assert her authority. Nothing was going to keep Pepe back from exploring and doing her own thing and we had our work cut out with her. Now we have built up trust with her she is the sweetest girl. I'm particularly close to her because Jakers was also the one disciplining her. I got to be the good cop and she bonded well with me. Getting them back into they're cage after a scoot out is a breeze. We either usher them along to the cage where they're happy to jump in themselves, or Pepe will crawl up onto my sleeve and I'll carry her over.

One night, Rocky had already climbed back in the cage himself and Pepe was lurking outside the cage. It was bedtime and I went to usher her in the cage. Even though she was right by it she insisted on doing a full circuit of the living room, running behind the chairs and sofa, eventually arriving right back at the cage and jumping in. This is just another example of how Pepe likes to do things her own way.

Right now she is weak and resting. I managed to force her to drink a few drops of warm water mixed with sugar and salt. The vet sait to try to encourage her to eat. I suggested plenty of fresh fruit and the vet replied "Whatever she wants". I'm going out shortly to get her some yoghurt and cheese. The yoghurt should be easier for her to take but if my sweetpea wants cheese she will have cheese.

Today Is A Gift

Yesterday is the past. Tomorrow is the future. Today is a gift, that's why we call it the 'present'

I wish I could cite this quote properly. I think, though I may be wrong, that it comes from a children's animated film, in which all humans have a 'spirit animal'. The reason I'm quoting it is because I've decided to quit smoking. I decided during the weekend that I would allow myself one more week of smoking and then that was it. It has been in my thoughts to quit for many years now but I carried on with my addiction, convincing myself that it was never the right time. There is no right time though and that kind of reasoning is merely a form of procrastination. There's no time like the present when it comes to getting things done.

I have allowed myself a week of mental preparation though. The reason being is I want a week of smoking but viewing it differently. Viewing it less as an addiction and more as just something silly that I do. I am noticing that I don't actually crave cigarettes so much. I wake up in the morning and convince myself that I could go without my morning smoke. I still have it but there isn't the same satisfaction.

I have made several lists. The first list is reasons why I should quit. I managed to come up with 10 reasons. When I feel the urge to smoke I just need to look at all those reasons for quitting. I also plan to keep myself extremely busy next week. When I'm not working I will try to fill my time constructively. I can paint, play guitar, excercise and read. I will go visitng friends in the evenings. Take as many driving lessons as I can possibly get and, basically, mentally and physically wear myself out so that I have no time to think about smoking.

As well as that I shall indulge in nature's remedies by taking lavender baths and drinking chamomile tea. Anything to take the edge off. I have been mentally prepping myself for dealing with the onset of cravings. I will tell myself that, not only will I be saving money, I won't stink or have stained teeth and I won't be setting a bad example to my darling nieces. So with all that in mind I feel well equipped to deal with whatever this whole stopping smoking buisness has in store for me. I don't assume it'll be a walk in the park but there's no point going into it with a defeatist attitude. Nicotene doesn't have control over me, I have control over me. Who knows what next week will bring though. It's just another big wave that I gotta ride out.

How Big Do You Want It?

I was chatting to a mate about music. Let's call this guy Lenny. He's a bit of a cheese merchant when it comes to music so when he was listing off a few bands that he liked, and he got to Nickelback, I scrunched up my face in disapproval and told him I hated them. Then I said, in all seriousness, "Nickelback, that's a kind of a fish, isn't it?"

"Naw", said Lenny, "That's a stickleback"

And then he went on to tell me that the band got the name Nickelback from when the lead singer worked in a shop and he was always saying "here's your nickel back". For some reason I felt the need to google this to make sure Lenny wasn't spinning some crap but he was telling the truth. The lead singer worked in Starbucks. So, I may become a famous rock star yet. I guess if I was going to name my band after a phrase I use all the time it could be Matt or Gloss? but that reminds me too much of the 80's duo Bros who were brothers call Matt and Luke. Another choice would be How Big Do You Want It? This, of course, is the question you ask when a customer is asking you to enlarge a photograph for them.

Life Is Like A Jigsaw

I can't wait to have kids. This is no secret. But it's not children I want to post about. This post is about how we fill our lives up with materialistic goods, a behaviour that is learned, rather than innate.

Jakers had his wee girl up tonight. She wants for nothing. For Christmas her daddy bought her a new phone. One of these android phones that does everything (except walk the dog). She also has a DS Nintendo. Both of which she had with her tonight but when I sat down to do my jigsaw she asked if she could help. So we spent the next hour jigsawing, which warmed wee Jakers' heart. Ok, we couldn't have bonded without some kind of materialistic possession, but surely a jigsaw is much more wholesome than computer games?

The point is though, children don't need T.V. and video games to entertain them, adults need them to entertain the kids. Why? Because life is so hectic and meaningless now that adults all rush around trying to do the things they think they're supposed to do, and they have no time to do the simple things with children. And the simple things really are very simple. I wholeheartedly believe that children will revel in almost any activity, so long as they have the company of others. Adults forget this and think it's better to do things alone because they'll get it done quicker and, more importantly, they'll get to do it their own way.

I've always believed I was born in the wrong era. I benefit form modern technology and I utilise it but I am aware of how souless it all is. I wonder when the term 'escapism' was coined and was there ever a time when we didn't feel the need to escape?

The Taoist That Strayed

You know how technology is, great when it's working, annoying when it's not. The other day in work we had a customer sitting at one of our computers choosing his photos. We do this when their CD or their pendrive doesn't work in the kiosks. Another customer walked in. I heard his voice before I actually seen him. It was a voice I knew as this particular guy has been in a few times and he's somewhat memorable.

I would call him an excitable chap. He doesn't so much speak but holler in a high pitched tone. He likes to chat about photography and how Apple is better than microsoft (a debate I refuse to participate in) and he doesn't like to make eye contact. I say none of this in a hateful way. He is quite the character.

Anyway, it was my colleague who was serving him at the kiosk and as she was finishing off his order the guy was pacing around the shop chatting away to no one in particular when he noticed the customer sitting at the computer. This is when my ears pricked up as I heard him say "I hope that's not Stray Taoist, he's my friend on Flickr"

Well, he didn't say Stray Taoist, what he said was Stray Toysta, but I knew he meant Stray Taoist and I knew that he had never atcually met him in person, just that he had him as a contact on Flickr.

The Man Who Wasn't Stray Taoist finished his order and left and our little friend said "I bet that was Stray Taoist". I sniggered to myself as I knew it most definitely wasn't but I didn't want to burst the guy's bubble.

So Mr. Taoist, if you have a wee random contact on your Flickr list that sounds like he might fit the bill of our delightful little customer you can let him know that it was most definitely not you sitting in my place of work. And you can thank him for brightening up my day.

In Which I Climb Through A Window

When you get to a certain age you begin to enjoy going back to normality after the festive season. Sure, work's a bore but you need that boredom to appreciate the calm and relaxation when you're not working.

This year is an important one for me. For no other reason than I've decided it is. I now have a goal for my driving. I aim to have my license before I turn 30 in April. This will also be the year that I save up so I can do some further education. I am sick of dead end jobs and caring way more than I am paid to care. But that's not my employer's fault, though it doesn't stop me hating them for it.

Basically, I hope to change my whole philosophy on life. I have spent long enough thinking about the things in life that make me happy. Now it is time to stop thinking and start doing. This involves being pro-active. It involves a healthy body and healthy mind. I have a tendency to get caught in negative thought processes. I need to learn jedi mind tricks to break the vicious cycles. Before Christmas I cut out sugar. It no longer has the hold it once had on me. The next stage of the process is excercise. And the stage after that is overcoming the evil beast that is nicotene.

If it doesn't happen this year I shall not be too hard on myself. We never know what's round the corner. The day before New Year's Eve I had a knock at the door. It was the Polish lady who lives in the flat below. She was anxious and asked if my boyfriend was home. Jakers was at work. She grabbed my arm asking me to come with her. As we rushed down the stairs she explained that the man that lived in the flat next to her wouldn't answer his door and he'd left his oven on. She had noticed when she was outside and she could smell burning. His kitchen window was slightly ajar and when she opened it smoke billowed out. She showed me quickly before dragging me into her flat to get a step ladder. Even though she was anxious she was eager for me to see her cosy flat and show me her bible. She needed me to to help because I was thin and she wouldn't fit through the window.

So, she held the step ladder for me as I climbed through the window to switch off the oven. The smoke was pretty bad. The kitchen door was closed and she reckoned the old man had fallen asleep. After she was sure that the oven was off she told me to come out. She thanked me and said that we had to do it because one day it could be me, or her, who was in need of help. I am sure that if I hadn't climbed through the window someone else would have noticed and helped, at least have called the fire brigade. But I suppose there's something kind of heroic about nipping it in the bud before it gets to that stage. And the old dude downstairs has his lovely Polish neighbour to thank for that. I often have chats with her on the stairs. And one day I walked in and she had a bunch of flowers. I commented on how nice they were and she plucked a few flowers from it and gave them to me. We should all strive to be as neighbourly as Gabi.

Like A Pack Of Teenagers

I love Dirt Bird. You could tell her that her favourite band was playing a special, private gig and you'd got her tickets to go but she'd still want to spend New Year's out at the Dreen with Nellybert. It's tradition now. Just the same as Boxing Day dinner is a tradition. Another tradition is the entertainment provided by Nellybert and Mr. and Mrs. Banjo. If you don't believe me here is the photographic evidence.



Mr. Banjo is on the prowl. At first Mr. Banjo tries whispering a few sweet nothings to Nelly. She is mildly disinterested.



Mr. Banjo tries a more hands on approach but Nelly, clearly, thinks that he is only after one thing, her precious bottle of wine.




Mr. Banjo is really trying his hand now. He goes in for a peck on the cheek, right in front of Bert, who is red with anger behind that big hand of his.



All of a sudden Mrs. Banjo appears, seemingly disapproving of Mr. Banjo's advances towards Nelly, Bert's anger has been replaced by an envy of the attention that Nelly is receiving. Nelly is red though not through anger, just sheer utter excitement.



Mrs. Banjo decides to give Mr. Banjo a taste of his own medicine and Bert's envy is replaced by joy and glee. Nelly is just mildly amused.

So that is how we spent the New Year. That and a bit of harmless New Year Planking. Mr. Banjo juinor received piano lessons off Dirt Bird and played chopsticks repeatedly for at least an hour and a half. She then taught him Auld Lang Syne just in time for the clock striking 12. He was under presseure too as we only asked him to learn it at twenty to twelve. He done great.

Mud Madness

Well, Christmas went by in a busy, blurry haze. Work was crazy the whole week before. My one day of reprieve was Friday, which was meant to be spent meeting Zoe and the girls for early morning coffee, a bit of last minute present buying, wrapping and delivering, meeting Mel for a while and a little bit of chilling. On Thursday I had a doctor's appointment. We were crazy in work and I had to leave at half four to make the doc's in Cullybackey. The shop was closing at half five but I said I'd call back to get a bit more done. I was out of the doc's by ten past five, moms kindly picked me up and dropped me back in Ballymena. I spent half an hour in work before going to get my haircut. It needed it, badly. I was in and out of the hairdressers in twenty minutes. I went back into work and stayed til ten past seven. I went home, changed my clothes, briefly said hello to Jakers and headed straight back out to meet Dirt Bird at the pub. I was there fifteen minutes before she arrived and it was the first time I stopped all day.

Then Dirt Bird arrived and we hugged and chatted, and then more people arrived and we drank and we chatted. There were guitars and singing and new friends and old friends and it was one of those nights where Richard was begging us to leave so he could lock up. Clearly in the mood for more drinking and merriment Dirt Bird and I headed to someone's house with a few others. That was when things started getting a bit hazy. I do remember, however, that it was about 4 O'Clock in the morning before I suddenly declared that I had to go home and eat. And five minutes later some kind of warm cheesy toastie was place in front of me, of which I ate half and then proceeded to start a fight with Dirt Bird. The fight was very brief and we made up five minutes later, whilst crying and hugging on the sofa. By which time it was 7 O'Clock in the morning and Jakers was phoning me wondering where I was. He was up for training. So I made the short five minute walk home, but not without slipping in the muddy grass and arriving at the door to Jakers a drunken, emotional, muddy mess.

Needless to say that the next day was a total washout. None of which really mattered except not meeting Z for coffee. It was the first time I've ever let down a 2 year old because of booze and it did not feel good. I did meet Mel though and introduced her to the delights of a mint frappe. Perfect for an overhang.

My Lovely Laptop

I have just transferred all my music from the old laptop to my new baby, I mean, new laptop. This included the music I pillaged from mum's collection. I have also been on a crazed downloading spree. I am committing the mortal sin of using itunes as my medium of choice. I know it's blasphemous but it's just so handy. I am in music heaven. I never know what song's gonna play next but I know it's gonna be awesome.

I've been using LastFM to discover new music. You just have to put in the name of a band you like and it will reccommend lots of similar bands. Somehow, I stumbled upon the amazing Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros and they are my new favourite band. I love the fact the lead singer, Alex Ebert, looks like Jesus. I also love the fact that the band played their first gig in a place called Marfa.

Music never used to be something I had to work at to get. If I came across a band I liked I'd just go to my dad's CD collection and, more than likely, discover that he had every album they ever made. Sometimes I ask him now what I should be listening to. But sometimes he keeps secrets from me. Like Melissa Auf Der Maur. I had to discover her all by myself. I guess I'm a big girl now. Not only that, my dad is the odd time disappointed in me for liking someone he hates, like Jose Gonzalez and Ray Lamontagne.

Break Your Back Mountains

I have learnt something about myself. A few days ago I felt totally hopeless. I had given up on a lot of things. My patience ran out and I hit rock bottom, yet again. It's common knowledge that we often have to be in the depths before we can rise above everything again. Sometimes people's ups and downs in life can be more dramatic. When they are going up in life they are climbing Mount Everest. It's a long way up and a long way down. The ups and downs are more gradual, with longer gaps between reaching the summit and falling back down again. My ups and downs seem more like I'm climbing Slemish. More of a hill, really, than a mountain. I don't seem to go too far before I'm falling back down again. The cycle comes round again so much more quickly. I guess I should probably try climbing Everest.

And, I shouldn't dwell too much on the falling down part, just be greatful that I have the most amazing people in my life to help me back on my feet. And I guess I should look past the summit of little old Slemish and see the great rolling hills behind it. They're a bit snowy at the minute but they'll be thawed in a week or two.

In the meantime, it is Christmas and there is plenty to be getting on with. There is even time to sit in front of the computer wishing I could be as flexible and agile as Lil Crabe here who can only be described as a breakdancing contortionist. It takes him a wee minute to get warmed up but please give him time as he's pretty damn awesome.

I Wish

Why can't I feel like this instead? How come I was more mature back then? Something tells me I shouldn't write this post, feeling the way I do, but I don't care. I want the world to know how I feel. Yes, there are good break-ups, but when they're shit, they're shit. And this one's shit.

Apparently, many people will have you believe, the universe is unfolding as it should. If that is so then what the fuck is the universe trying to tell me? Because I'm bored of this unfolding and thinking that, finally, everything's gonna be ok only to be slapped in the face and right back at square one. Yes, I am talking about the unravelling of my relationship. But, I'm also talking about it all, life in general.

I have nothing solid or concrete. I have focused more on trying to be the best person I could rather than 'grounding' myself. Part of my quest for self approval (a tough one as I have very high standards) was to experience the world a little and broaden my horizons. And now I look back on my quest of self discovery and realise that achieving my dream of travel is what broke me in the end. So, how can I believe in anything anymore, let alone true love? And how can you have a soul mate if you have no soul?

Learning the Hard Way

It's hard to believe I'm turning 30 next year. Especially when I make the kind of foolish mistakes that shouldn't be made by someone who is nearly 30.

I've been suffering from a nasty cough for a few weeks now. Jakers had it before me and I was hoping I wouldn't get smited because I could see how it was one of those lingering ones. The cough, for me, is particularly bad at night so I bought myself a cough bottle. I have went through pretty much every single cold and flu of my life without medicating myself. The first real flu I ever had (a freshers flu at uni) I got by on just a vicks inhaler. I didn't realise I had flu because I never had one before. And, I wasn't aware of flu remedies.

So every single cold I've had I've just muggled on because it was never as bad as that flu. But someone told me recently "When you feel pain, that's God's way of reminding you to take painkillers". I'm not a of purist though. I have munched my way through endless packets of pills when I've been suffering from frequent bouts of toothache. But colds never seem to warrant medication.

So, I bought myself a cough bottle, which helped me get a half decent sleep at least. When the bottle ran out and the cough had not shifted I went to the medicine cabinet and hoked out a bottle of medicine I was prescribed for blocked sinuses and ears. I somehow equated this medicine with my Boots cough bottle. Medicine's medicine, surely? Especially when they both come in the same form of a gloopy, sweet syrup. Bound to soothe the throat. Well, it did. And I still only used it at night when the cough was worse.

After a few days of feeling woozy, lightheaded and weak I tried to think about what was making me feel this way. The fact that I've completely cut sugar and e-numbers from my diet made me think I could be suffering from sugar withdrawal. A quick search on the internet showed that some of the symptoms were similar but after two weeks the worst of it should have been over. I've been off sugar for two months now. Another quick internet search showed that the medicine pseudoephedrine is much more likely to be the cause. It is a nasal and sinus decongestant and does nothing at all for a dry tickly cough. It is also a stimulant and it's adverse effects include anxiety, excitability, dizziness and palpitations.

So, it seems, the pseudoephedrine is the culprit for why I feel so goddam awful. Everytime I breathe in I feel lightheaded and woozy. This wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to constantly breathe in. But, sadly, I do. My energy levels are worse than they've ever been and I feel like I'm wading through mud. I have butterflies in my tummy and I just want to sleep for a million years. I threw the medicine in the bin yesterday but I guess I just need to work the rest out of my system. And, not only that, before I was taking the medicine my sinuses were 100 per cent and now I can feel them getting all sore and sensitive. At the grand age of 29, I have learnt the all important lesson of only taking prescription medicines for what they were, initially, prescribed for.

FaceBlockr

So this makes sense: I have a facebook, flickr and blogger accounts. Why not roll it all into one?? Clever. Except that there's something I like about having it all seperate. My blogger is mostly for family to read about what's going on in my life (or what's not going on in my life). Sometimes I feel I should be sensible in my choice of what to share with the world. After all, it's a wide open space for all of cyberland to see.

Facebook is more for reminding everyone I ever kissed, hugged or got drunk with that I am still alive and still me. I can be a bit more open on Facebook knowing that only certain people can see my life.

Flickr is my photo account but the photos that I choose to share on it portray me as a doting aunt and a fairly normal human who gets out and about oncest in a while and takes nice photos of nice things.

The photos I upload to Facebook, however, portray me as a stupid, drunk, nearly-thirty-year-old who really is old enough to know better but is too stupid and drunk to care. People I don't want to see the photos don't. The ticket is to politely decline any unwanted friends and blame the ether for swallowing up all the data that was intended to be their friendshop request. I am well used to shrugging my shoulders and saying "technology". I will not go into how technology is much like a woman because I am a woman and that would be inappropriate. All's I will say on that matter is Spice Birds, Girl Power, where the f**k did that get us?

But anyway, back to the topic of Tumblr and rolling everything all into one handy account which would actually suit me very much as I find it difficult to remember more than one username and password combination. Do I opt for convenience over my right to split personality disorder. Do I succumb to being one boring, middle of the road me or do I cling on to the fact that in certain web spaces I can choose to show only the parts of me that I want to at that particular time? Who knows? Apparently this Tumblr thing isn't really gonna catch on until 2014 (this makes me laugh, how can they possibly predict such a thing?) so do I get in there early and when everyone else catches on I can declare it shite just as all the early facebookers did with bebo, or do I give in to the fact that I am deluding myself over the fact that I am so interesting as to have multiple cyber personalities? And maybe it's too late.

I Like The Way You Moo!

I stumbled across this. I'm not normally a lover of stupid things but I couldn't help laugh at this one partly because I like the original tune but, mostly because I like cows. And I like they they're big brown snouts.

Little Shop Of Sunshine

Okay, I need humoured. I have a plan. A very lucrative buisness plan. I was discussing it today with my work colleague, who is also my childhood best friend. I've told her, on many's a drunken night, that our paths did not meet again to fester away in a downtown shop making the rich man richer and make ourselves cynical and bitter. Oh no! We were destined for much greater things.

So, our plan involves running our own shop. This shop will sell everything handcrafted. A range of jewelry made from beads, silver, fimo and whatever else we can get our hands on. I'm thinking of covering all areas from classic to kitsch. There will also be a wood section. For years I've been saying to Bert, who's a bit of a wood whisperer, that he should get into the wooden toy market. I told him I would sell them in a heartbeat. I also know a few other people that are a dab hand at the arts and crafts. Basically, we would run the shop as a co-operative. Whoever wanted to sell their products could.

I like the idea of the workshop being open as well so that when people come into browse you don't have to be breathing down they're neck. Our shop would have a lovey ambient atmosphere. And it would smell like fresh watermelon and kiwi.

I'd like to make use of the beeswax out at Nellybert's. Unfortunately Burt's Bees is already a well known product so I think we'd have to think of another name for all the lip bams, hand creams and ointments I'll be making.

Obviously there'd be a photography section where local photographer's (not naming names, cough cough) could display and sell they're art. And I think it would be nice to offer a selection of tasty homemade cupcakes and muffins. Oh, and I forgot, I know a good few people who can knit up a storm :)

I got very excited when I was telling Jakers all about it. He says he could do a website for it. I like the idea of having a buisness that, if it worked, would benefit not only me but several members of my family and friends. I know it's a cut throat word out there and I know that I think about things in a somewhat naive way but sure, if it makes me happy for an evening.

A Cuddle With Charlie

So it's day 3 out at the Dreen. Mum and Bert are in Norfolk visiting Katkins. I am on duty. This is how the average day goes: I wake up. While carers are in with Pearlie I let out pigs and hens and feed them. I come in and light Pearlie's fire and make her tea. Give Bonnie her tablet and give all 3 dogs breakfast. Then it's time for a coffee for me. Quick wash and check on Pearlie's fire. In the evening there's the whole siege of putting hens and pigs back in and feeding the dogs, cats, Pearlie and me.

In between the morning and evening rushes there are endless cups of tea to be made, several trips to the shed for fuel replenishment, the odd egg to fry and (thanks to Charlie having an upset tummy) quite a lot of soiled newspapers to bin. I have also been able to squeeze in a bit of time for internetting, dog grooming and painting. I have also came up with clues for a treasure hunt for my youth group. I pillaged mum's music collection and did a bout of dowloading and so I now have my ipod up and running again. This is the most productie I've been. Ever.

Charlie has been etting on not too bad without mum and Bert and Judy. He hangs in the sitting room with me and tries to lark about with the other 2 dogs. Paddy positively hates him and Bonnie is not particularly keen on him either. So Charlie makes do with me and the cats. He's cuddling with me on the sofa now.

Kung Fu Come Do What You Do To Me

It's been all go go go here this week again. We had the builders in changing our heating syste from Economy 7 to gas. It's been totally worth the upheaval to have lovely toasty radiators and hot water on demand. We got a nice new gas fire put in, which is lovely for us but sad for the rats as the little gap underneath the old firelace was their favourite hidey hole.

In order for the gas to be changed we had to redd out the cuboards that had hel all the junk Jakers wouldn't let me throw in the skip when I first moved in. Seeing it all out on the floor made him realise that he needs to get rid of a good bit more junk. I wasn't allowed to chuck it all though as, I've recently learnt, Jakers has a strange sentimental attachment to certain broken objects. For example, he wouldn't let me throw away the, now useless, graphics card from his very first computer. Nor would he part with an old mixing deck that he and Dr. D had recorded many's a drunken tune on. I understand we all grow attached to inanimate objects but this, to me, includes things like teddy bears and old letters. The idea that anyone can become attached to technology seems ludicrous. Having said that, I don't think Jakers sentiments are wrong, I just find it odd how we can be so different.

Tonight is Jakers big night. I'm not saying anything about it until I know the outcome. This is because I don't even know if I'll want to write about it. He's excited and nervous. I've a feeling I should be too but I'm calm at the minute. Let's see how calm and colleted I am in a few hours!

Sisters

Well, it's been busy and exciting times. I now have two gorgeous nieces instead of one and, I have to say, one of the highlights this year was being present when the two sisters were introduced.

On Saturday night Jakers and I went bowling with his mum, his brother and The Boyfriend. The mum's boyfriend that is, not his brother's boyfriend. We had a great wee night and it ended with many ciders, a few whiskies, a music sesh and pizza. Actually it didn't end there, it ended with me Jakers and his bro walking back home with Jakers shouting at me to hurry up while I drunkenly dawdled by behind claiming that I was just doing my 'own wee thing'. I'm not sure what 'my own wee thing was' because I went home and promptly passed out, fully clothed, on top of the bed.

Well, I had planned on doing a really nice thoughtful post on Sisters, y'know, because of my sister giving birth to a sister for her daughter. Just gets you thinking....but, unfortuntely, my train of thought was interrupted by Jaker's and a mate coming in from training, all full of testosterone and pumped up on protein shakes and doing stretches, manly ones of course. So it kinda rained on my sweet girly sentiments. I will keep for another day.

The Good, The Bad And The Rest

Today I am feeling lazy. Too lazy to construct paragraphs. So I will sum up my week in a series of good and bad points. Obviously, being the sort of person that I am, I will start with the negative:

Bad Thing - Having wisdom tooth ripped out leaving me sore and naive :(

Good Thing - Jakers reading my mind and knowing that an omelette was exactly what I
wanted for dinner :)

Bad Thing - Rotten taste in my mouth due to aforementioned extraction :(

Good Thing - Off sweets, chocolates, biscuits and desserts for over a week and feel
great :)


Bad Thing - Off sweets chocolates and biscuits and a new and interesting sweet shop
has just opened :(

Good Thing - Successful driving lesson. 10+ roundabouts conquered :)

Bad Thing - Still shit at changing gears and general driving :(

Good Thing - Going round to Jaker's friends' for authentic Peruvian cuisine :)

Bad Thing - General annoyance at work :(

Good Thing - Tomorrow is Sunday :)